At the beginning of the summer I had it in my mind that I would throw an ice cream social. My intentions, I discovered later, were to be known as the best mom ever and have everyone in the neighborhood like me. Summer wore on and the children all played together in the neighborhood. By playing together I mean they got sweaty, rode bikes, ate a ton of our snacks, captured(and killed) lots of frogs, and fought! The fighting part was not on my list of summer fun, but it is definitely a part of summer. I found myself having to keep a window cracked, so that I could hear when the emotions had escalated. I would then go out and referee the argument. Kids do not naturally know how to resolve conflict! Add to the conflict the different family dynamics in our neighborhood and I was finding myself in a job I was not expecting. It wasn't a daily job, but the emotional toll it took/takes on my heart is daily. This unexpected position started to reveal to me my heart towards the kids in the neighborhood. I found, after watching and interacting with them in such raw intense emotion, that it was very easy to give a cold shoulder, take my kids away, or judge the parents. I was in need of just as much training on conflict resolution as they were, but mine came from a different source. I would have to take a lot of deep breaths, ask the Holy Spirit to help me not lose my temper, and seek God about how to love these kids he had put in our neighborhood. And let me just say, I was praying that I would love my kids as well!
It was in this place of my own heart work where I discovered
why I
wanted to give a fun party to the kids. I selfishly wanted to give them
an ice cream social, so that I could take pictures, post to Instagram,
and be known as the fun mom in the neighborhood and amongst my friends.
Yuck! My heart was not for the kids, it wasn't for my neighborhood, and
it certainly wasn't to love them the way Christ would. I wanted to use
them. Upon this discovery, I asked for forgiveness! I started praying
for all of the kids, mine included. I started hanging outside with the
kids a few times a week, and I started letting them come in my house
more. I had to choose to not be skeptical all of the time, and to look
at each one with kind eyes. All of these actions resulted in a renewed
desire to give the kids something fun and this time it happened to be
right around the start of school. I texted a few moms a day or two
before to see if they could send some cake cones and toppings. They were
happy to be a part of the fun and we gave the kids an ice cream social.
One little girl wore a dress, because she said she never gets to go
anywhere special enough to wear it! Another girl brought her Mp3 player
and Katherine hooked it up to her boombox. They had music, dancing, and
ice cream. I had a change of heart with some sprinkles on top.
