As I started to spend time with the Lord daily through the Bible, prayer and meditation I started to see clearly through these new eyes He had given me. It took me quite a while to believe that loving my husband and loving my kids was enough for Him. You mean to tell me God that if I just love my man and spend time with my kids that I will please you?? More then please Him I felt like it erupted a joy and laughter from his gut that only these type of simple disciplines could bring. I started to see that I was getting to something a lot deeper then I had originally planned.
If any of you know me, I can perform like nobody's business. I can put on a show and take the stage with no problem. Speak, sing , prophesy, dance, pray, give me a mic and I am good to go. Need a leader to get a crowd going, I am your woman. Herein lies the problem! I went to a Beth Moore simulcast and I really didn't think I was going for any particular reason until I was on my face crying my eyes out. He, in His faithfulness, showed me that the pit I was in was lined in wallpaper with my face all over it. I was so consumed with my abilities that I actually thought it was my own goodness that had caused the Lord to want to save me!! Imagine that. I was lost as the day is long and He has been so good to expose my heart and clean me up. He revealed to me that He led me to this road of just me and Him so that I can see it is ONLY HIM that can save this wretched soul! It is not by anything my hands could have done. It is only by the Precious blood of Jesus, that while I was still a sinner Christ died for me. In that moment I just wept! I got up off the floor and since then I have seen myself and others differently. I am now seeing through eyes of one who has been humbled by His great mercy(unmerited favor) towards me.
****I am so thankful for that day. In the days to come you will read of ways my relationships have changed because of that wonderful encounter with my Lord and Savior
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